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Posts Tagged ‘Faking Hell Blog’

with Mad Mad Madusa

Hello my pretties,

I am Madusa, the mad bitch Goddess of Brutal Reality.

Look into my eyes, um, eye and you will see reflected back the tragic frippery of your shallow fakeness.

Be Real. Obey.

I, mad mad Madusa, say DO UNTO YOUR OWN FACE WHAT YOU WISH.

.

If you want to look like a reupholstered ferret, go right ahead, Ferret Face.

.

Some medicos grab the $$$$ treating those with faked up views of their own bodies – BODY DYSMORPHIC DISORDER – to create FREAKY FOLK.

Are these FREAKY FOLK? You decide.

Jocelyn Wildenstein

The Inflate-a-date-ectomy!

.

Donatella Versace

The Muppet-Me Makeover

.

Mickey Rourke

The Donatella-oscopy

Melanie Giffiths

Botoxic Shock

.

Nip ‘n Tuck Queen Cher

My Plastic Surgeon Made Lady Gaga Outa My Leftovers!!!!

Fake Bananas: 

Madam Madusa says ‘ The secret to my youthful complexion is to use a very old photograph.’

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Yeah! Yeah! I’m a Mary Poppin’s Pooch in a strong wind.

Funny thing though. I get to pee at the top of the lamp post. Nice.

bat dog

Na nanananana Bat Dog!

Catwomen be afraid. Be very afraid.

o-MICHAEL-JACKSON-DOG-570

My owner says I’m Michael Jackson

Sooo not true. I’m Russell Brand.

fire engine corgi

How do I put out fires? Don’t ask.

It’s pathetic! I asked for Armani and they gave me this!

.

I’m a poodle House Frau cross. That makes me a Froodle!!!!!

.

The humiliation. Oh, the humiliation! I’m a Hello Kitty Chihuahua!

Fake Bananas:

Madam Madusa says ‘Some are mad and some are truly BARKING MAD!’.

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with Mad Mad Madusa

mad mad madusa widgetHello My Pretties,

I am Madusa, the mad bitch Godess of Brutal Reality.

Look into my eyes, um, eye and you will see reflected back the tragic frippery of your shallow fakeness.

Be Real. Obey.

……………………………………..

At last, here it is …

…………………………………….

…………………………………….

The Top 40  Salt and Pepper Shakers

of Rock and Roll:

40. The Mamas and The Papas – Dancing in the streets

39. Elvis Presley – Hound Dog

38. Nirvana – Come As You Are

37. Peter, Paul and Mary – Puff the Magic Dragon

36. Nick Cave and The Bad Seeds – Into My Arms

35. The Sex Pistols – God Save the Queen

34. Elvis Presley – Jailhouse Rock

33. The Beatles – I am the Walrus

32. Simon and Garfunkel – The Boxer

31. Metallica – Enter Sandman

30. The Beatles – Yellow Submarine

29. Pixies – Where Is My Mind?

28. Gloria Gaynor – I will Survive

27. Deep Purple – Soldier of Fortune

26. Michael Jackson Thriller

25. Eagles Desperado

24. Elvis Presley – Blue Suede Shoes

23. Bob Dylan – Lay Lady Lay

22. The Beatles – Ob-La-di Ob-La-dah

21. Powderfinger – These Days

20. Creedance Clearwater Revival – Proud Mary

19. White Stripes – Seven Nation Army

18. Elton John – Goodbye Yellow Brick Road

17. Janis Joplin – Me and Bobbie McGee

16. The Beach Boys – California Girls

15. Roy Orbison – Pretty Woman

14. Eric Clapton – Cocaine

13. Radiohead – Creep

12. The Beatles – Sgt Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band

11. REM – Everybody Hurts

10. Joni Mitchell – Big Yellow Taxi

9. The Beatles – Yesterday

8. Red Hot Chili Peppers – Under The Bridge

7. Bob Dylan – Blowin’ in the Wind

6. Queen – Bohemian Rhapsody

5. Radiohead – Paranoid Android

4. Pink Floyd – Another Brick in the Wall

3. Jeff Buckley – Hallelujah

2. Led Zeppelin – Stairway to Heaven

1. Nirvana – Smells Like Teen Spirit

plus

The Worst Rock Merchandise EVER.

You’ll find more weird merch and crazy fan tributes @ each link.

10. Kurt Cobain Doll

My doll, my doll, don't you lie to me, tell me where did you sleep last night?

My doll, my doll, don’t you lie to me, tell me where did you sleep last night?

9. The Metallica Pizza

The To Hell and Back Pizza with that burning Metallica after-taste.

The To Hell and Back Pizza
with that burning Metallica after-taste.

8. Nick Cave Push Puppet

But when I crawl into your arms Everything, it comes tumbling down

But when I crawl into your arms
Everything, it comes tumbling down

7. Bob Dylan Baby Suit

And watch out for whatever is ‘blowin’ in the wind too.

And watch out for whatever is ‘blowin’ in the wind too.

6. Butchering The Beatles LP

I wanna hold your LIVER.

I wanna hold your LIVER.

5. Elvis Zombie Tattoo

Oh, my love, my darling I’ve hungered for your brain!

Oh, my love, my darling
I’ve hungered for your brain!

4. Sid Vicious Doll

Vomit sold separately

Vomit sold separately

3. Yellow Submarine John Lennon Doll

John Lennon Doll with Creepy Creature.  It could be named Yoko, not sure.

John Lennon Doll with Creepy Creature.
It could be named Yoko, not sure.

2. Michael Jackson Doll with Extra Hands

A Michael Jackson Doll with 9 extra hands.  That's freaking creepy.

A Michael Jackson Doll with 9 extra hands.
That’s freaking creepy.

1. Radiohead Thom Yorke Nipple Tattoo

'I couldn’t look you in the eye’ lyrics taken to another level altogether.

‘I couldn’t look you in the eye’ lyrics taken to another level altogether.

You can get all the Killer Kitsch you want, at Mad Madusa’s Restaurant.

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16a NY girl s&p

Well, east coast girls

Are hip.

16b skier s&p

I really dig those

Styles they wear

rock 'n roll girl

And the Southern girls

With they way they talk,

They knock me out

When I’m down there.

16d farmer s&p

The mid-west farmer’s daughters

Really make you feel alright

16e baseball kiss s&p

And the Northern girls

With the way they kiss,

They keep their boyfriends

Warm at night.

 

I wish they all could be

California girls.

16f surfer guy  s&p

I wish they all could be

California girls.

16g tennis s&p

I wish they all could be

California girls

…………………………………………….

Worst Beach Boys Merch:

brian wilson doll

With your very own Brian Wilson Doll

You can have fun, fun , fun until your Daddy takes your Brian Doll away

and sends you to a shrink.

ALSO….

BB Muscle Up fig

Wind Up Push-Up Preston

and he does push ups while you sing Help Me, Rhonda.

……………………………..

Worst Beach Boys Tributes:

The Beach Boys in Concert on NBC's Today Show Toyota Concert Series - August 12, 2005

Beach Boy Mike Love wearing a shirt dedicated to, ah!,

himself and the boys.

BeachBoysMonument  Hawthorne Cal

The Beach Boys monument Hawthorne, California.

This is planning ahead because they are not dead yet

… just the one.

………………………………………

Fake Bananas:

Madam Madusa says ‘OMG They’ve found Brain Wilson. He’s shacked up with the little old lady from Pasadena. Go granny Go.’

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12a beatles drums S&P

It was twenty years ago today,

Sgt. Pepper taught the band to play

12b Salt-and-Pepper-Museum-The-Beatles-2

They’ve been going in and out of style

But they’re guaranteed to raise a smile

 

So may I introduce to you

The act you’ve known for all these years

12c Sgt Pepper pots

Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band

We’re Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band

We hope you will enjoy the show

12d SGT S&P

Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band

Sit back and let the evening go

Sgt. Pepper’s lonely, Sgt. Pepper’s lonely

Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band

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Worst Sgt Pepper’s Tribute:

OK. When the Beatles wrote Sgt Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band Salt&Pepper merch was inevitable although the wind-up Salt & Pepper Shakers (above) was pushing the frontier.

Here are the worst tributes:Sgt Pepper finger puppets

Sgt Pepper Finger Puppets

Imagine all the people … stuck on the end of your fingers!!

Sgt Peppers Cats sculpture

Sgt Pepper Cats as in I wanna hold your paw

Sgt Pepper my little ponies

Sgt Pepper’s My Little Ponies …

He was a Day Trotter Yeah!

…………………………………….

Worst Sgt Pepper’s Merch:Sgt Pepper Toby jugs

Sgt Pepper’s Toby Jugs … All You Need is beer!

Sgt Pep thongs

Sgt Pepper flip Flops .. They’ve been going in and out of style
But they’re guaranteed to raise a smile.

…………………………………………..

Fake Bananas:

Madam Madusa says ‘OMG. The girl with kaleidoscope eyes must be in charge of marketing!’

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7 s&p man with suitcase    saltandpeppershakers

How many roads must a man walk down,

7a rock song s&p man  anon

before you call him a man?

7b indian& pilgrim s&p

How many seas must a white dove fly,

7c indian squaw  as&p7d teepee S&P 2

before she sleeps in the sand?

7e rock song s&p cannon  tias

And how many times must a cannon ball fly,

before they’re forever banned?

7f rock song s&p gone with the wind   entertainmentearth   

The answer my friend is blowing in the wind,

    the answer is blowing in the wind.

…………………………………….

Worst Bob Dylan Merch:

dylan

The Bob Dylan Babushka Doll

How many freaking Bob Dylan Dolls does

one man need?

Fake Bananas:

Madam Madusa says ‘The answer my friend is probably in Wikipedia now’.

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6 white s&p  thisnext

Is this the real life?

6a house rabbit s&p  foolsihgadgets

Is this just fantasy?

Caught in a landslide, No escape from reality

6b lookup s&p    anon

Open your eyes,

6bb rock song s&p cloud heaven

Look up to the skies and see,

I’m just a poor boy, I need no sympathy

…………………………….

Because I’m easy come, easy go, Little high, little low

Any way the wind blows doesn’t really matter to me, to me

6c hug mama  s&p touchofeurope

Mama, just killed a man,

6d rock song s&p pistol  tias

Put a gun against his head

6e rock song s&p brain   oddee

Pulled my trigger,

6f rock song s&p broken  rhodribrady

now he’s dead

Mama, life had just begun

6g salt-spill  s&p  femalefirst

But now I’ve gone and thrown it all away

6h cry  s&p  luxist

Mama, ooh, Didn’t mean to make you cry

If I’m not back again this time tomorrow

carry on, carry on as if nothing really matters.

…………………………………

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Worst Queen Merch:

Freddie Mercury Bag

Considering the lyrics of this song,

the Freddie Carry On Carry On bag sucks.

queen-muisc-band-lego

All in all you’re just another brick in the wall

Oops!

Wrong group. (See Top 40 S&P Shakers No. 4)

…………………………………….

Fake Bananas:

Madam Madusa says ‘Queen is dead. Long live the Queen.’

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