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Archive for the ‘Bad Taste Barbies’ Category

Here are the 10 Top Beyond Belief Career Barbies:

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1. Please Dr Barbie can you help me. It’s an emergency.

I can’t scratch my butt. It’s my arms. I can’t bend them.

A little to the left. Oooohhh! Nice.

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2. Pastor Barbie, if you pray hard enough God will give Ken a reason to live.

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3. It isn’t fair, Tennis Barbie.

Of course, there should be a Bimbo Olympics.

You’d win Gold in the High Heel Hit & Giggle Doubles, the 100m Catwalk Sashay

and the Shot Putting contest at the local Happy Hooters Bar.

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4. Miss Barbie.

Why is you teaching us geografuffy? We are only 2.

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5. Huston to Astronaut Barbie. Over. DO NOT … repeat … DO NOT TAKE YOUR POODLE FOR A SPACE WALK … AHHHHHHHHH!

(Funny. In space you can hear you pout.)

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6. President Barbie, the speech. ‘Four score and seven doll years ago our toymakers brought forth on this continent a new doll, conceived in flibberty-gibberty, and dedicated to the proposition that no woman’s anatomy will be created equal to Barbie.’

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7. Scuba Barbie, not waving, drowning!!!

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8. Stewardess Barbie, you are meant to inflate the life jacket on top of your jacket not under it.

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9. Fire Fighter Barbie, stop dancing to the fire alarm. It’s not music. And stop writhing on that pole. A crew member will land on your head.

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10. Paratrooper Barbie. This is war. Kill those enemy Bratz dolls.

Stab them with your fingernails.

Crush them with your stiletto heels.

And torch them with your hairdryer.

Give those big-headed bitches split ends. Ha!

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Fake Bananas:

Madam Madusa says ‘My favourite Barbie is TNT Barbie. BOOM. Tinkle. Tinkle. Tinkle.’.

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